As part of my involvement in the UBBT (Ultimate Black Belt Test) I was tasked with creating a project that would benefit the martial arts world, my community, and maybe even the world. This is when the idea of "The Boys to Gentlemen Project" was born.
The idea of what it means to be a "gentleman" is something I have thought about for a long time. Most of the conversations I have had around this topic were after seeing an interaction, or talking with a friend (usually female) about an unfortunate circumstance (usually involving a guy) and asking "Where are people's manners nowadays?" or "Didn't anyone teach them about basic respect for others?". I mean, my father did his best to give me a sense of respect and instill manners. Even with that there are times I look back on and ask myself "what was I thinking!?" or "I could have handled that better." Basically there are times where I could have been more "Gentlemanly"
After all the conversations and reflection this led me to have to admit something that, as a man, was hard to accept:
Men are responsible for the majority of evil in the world.
Yes there are some great men out there. Plenty of them in fact. But when it comes to all of the horrible acts (big or small) that take place in this world they are, nine out of ten times, perpetrated by men.
Why is that? What is it about being a man that makes this a fact? Where do we learn this behavior? What is it about our culture that might encourage it? And, more importantly, what do we do about it?
I wish I knew the answer, but I am going to do my best to find out. I do feel, however, that we must do what we can to help the next generation of men to grow up as respectful, courteous, ethical, responsible, humble, and all the other things that I, right now, associate with being a gentleman. We must also inspire the current generation of men to look deeply at their behavior and how it affects others. We must understand what influences our behaviour. And we must keep the dialog open so that we may always expand our knowledge on the subject.
I hope you will join me on this journey. I hope you will contribute, as the best ideas come from the dialog sparked by the topic. I know that no matter what comes of this, we will all grow in the process. That alone will be a step towards helping the next generation of men ones to be proud of.
